Depression 1

I've been busy lately, not because of work load at the office but heavily indulging painting artworks. I've also absolutely no idea to write about anything at all. Well, this could be something to write about but somehow the feel is not there. I guess my feel has gone into the canvas!

There is a lot of things that I could write about with the many things happening around. The recession is deepen, more and more people are out of work. Even I'm currently at the risk of redundancy. My sister completed her medical foundation studies in Ireland, my younger brother's married and we've bought tickets to fly home to attend his wedding reception in April.

The sudden of all the arising problem and things happening around me have somehow stopped and froze in time. I do care about things happening around me but the fact that I'm so into my painting as if nothing is more important than the painting itself. From time to time I'd be staying up late with just myself alone inside the painting. Sometimes when I stop to rest from doing the painting it was already 2 in the morning. And when I'm at the office I just couldn't wait to finish the job and go home to my painting..crazy, ain't it?

When you come to think about it this is one way to keep my mind straight and not be so depress with the current economic situation. I don't have any PlayStation or Wii to enjoy with (try to avoid the children from becoming addicted to computer games) but I do have my own playground. My playground is the canvas that could also take hours and hours of adrenaline. Similarly with games consul, I also could change my own environment and places that I wanted to be but with far more freedom.

This somehow doesn't mean that we need to run away from the fact and problem in life. Like one of my favourite Malay movie Ali Setan quote "Hidup nie mesti ada problem, kau perlulah banyak bersabar"(You will have problem in your life, but you must be patient). We need to be prepared for the worst to come not to expect for the worst never came. The things that we'd planned if the D-day were to happen. InsyaAllah, we could make it trough the storm.

However, the real depression is the uncertainty of the situation. Yes, we would never know what was going to happen tomorrow but the certain amount of confidence is needed to keep us from the limbo. We could not carry on with the normal life or plan anything ahead if there is no real date for the D-day. It may or may not happen.

Enough with this babbling. I will get myself or yourself more depress. I will follow the step of Le-Corbusier in making artwork and becoming the master of myself. Till then, I shall indulge myself back into the lovely sunny painting of mine. Cheers!